Must-be-nice-syndrome 

Must-be-nice-syndrome 

Have you ever found yourself cynical or having difficulty being encouraging to others when they tell you about their positive life experiences and self-care practices? Same. So when I experience breakthrough, joy and excitement I find myself holding back on sharing not wanting to cause anyone else to feel bad. Must-be-nice-syndrome is really a red flag signal that we are lacking in the self-care department.

The New Year’s resolution that not only will change your life but everyone around you.

The New Year’s resolution that not only will change your life but everyone around you.

Instead of looking at what habit you want to change or adapt for the new year I want to turn resolutions upside down. Let’s first look at what motivates you to change, rather than the habit you want to change. At the core of our motivations as humans are connections and relationships, but when we are experiencing compassion fatigue we tend to isolate. Setting ourselves up low motivation.

Managing those who suck up all your time on Sunday

Managing those who suck up all your time on Sunday

“Pastor, do you have a minute?”   Famous last words… Both of you know it’s not just one minute. Soon enough, you start working on the body language to indicate that the convo needs to come to a close. After all it’s Sunday and after service is not the time or...

Just Let Me Be Alone

Just Let Me Be Alone

When was the last time you went out to a social event because YOU wanted to go? Not because you were required because of your job, or because family expected you to, but because you genuinely were looking forward to going out, seeing people, laughing and enjoying the...

5 Ways to (still!) Meet Your Needs While Supporting Others

5 Ways to (still!) Meet Your Needs While Supporting Others

Two phone calls to struggling parents, one hospital visit, a support session with someone who has been going through a rough time in their marriage and that’s not counting the six voicemails and the 38 emails that are waiting for a response. *bing* Oh, make that 39...

How long have you been working today?

How long have you been working today?

“15 hours” “That’s crazy” he responded and headed to bed. When my husband asked me this question I paused to think. The question came at 11 pm and I still had my computer open, stretching my neck every 10 minutes from looking down at the screen for hours. It was a...

How to debrief without burdening

How to debrief without burdening

Unicorns pooping slime? Why is this even a thing?! My children have been obsessed with slime. This must be a common experience because the toy industry has developed every way in which slime can be marketed. I have avoided slime in my house as much as possible, but...

Have you ever felt trapped in your circumstances?

Have you ever felt trapped in your circumstances?

Emotionally and physically exhausted from the work of caring and supporting others, I was feeling hopeless, hard and dried up. I began to doubt that anything would change.  Every door and opportunity I tried to open — in the hopes of refreshing — closed in my face....

I’m Disqualified

I’m Disqualified

“Am I just wasting time?” Me, just a few days ago. Today is Monday. A new week. A new day and I’m curious what God is going to make of it. Last week was brutal though. In just about every area of my life I felt withdrawn and discouraged. Last week was full of chaos,...

Shut the Windows and Get out of the House

Shut the Windows and Get out of the House

A $10 carbon monoxide detector saved us from being killed in our sleep from a build-up of odourless toxic gas. Here’s the full (true!) story on The Day My Furnace Tried To Kill Me. It’s worth a read. After being woken up from the carbon monoxide alarm we quickly...